4 Ways To Stop Thinking Negatively About Your Body, Part 1 [Podcast Transcript]

Title: 4 Ways To Stop Thinking Negatively About Your Body Part 1

Podcast Date: August 27, 2024

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Description 

Don't believe everything you think. That's what host, Heather Creekmore, discusses today as she encourages Christian women on how to handle internal negative thoughts that can become obsessive. Heather provides scriptural and practical guidance for taking control of these thoughts. The episode delves into combating negative self-perceptions and the harmful influence of societal ideals. It also discusses the importance of addressing the heart and belief systems as the first step toward transforming thought patterns. Heather will encourage you to preach the gospel to your doubts and how real faith isn't just about knowing Jesus died for you, but about practicing living in a way that shows you believe He is the truth. 

Go check out our brand new Etsy show to get cute podcast merch: https://www.improvebodyimage.com/shop

New to the show? Learn more about Heather Creekmore, Heather's books, and the ministry of Compared to Who? at: www.improvebodyimage.com

Ready for real body image change? The 40-Day Journey begins soon. Learn more here: https://www.improvebodyimage.com/40-day-challenge

Outline

00:00 40 Day Journey Review

04:18 Don’t Believe Everything You Think

09:00 The Overwhelm of Taking Thoughts Captive

12:08 Diet Culture’s Shame Motivated Mantras

17:32 Why Just Changing Your Thoughts Won’t Work

20:48 Expose The Values Beneath Our Thoughts

24:57 Choose Obedience And Speak Truth

40 Day Journey Participant [00:00:08]:

The 40 day body image workbook is truly like nothing I'd ever read before. I first learned of Heather Creekmore at the end of 2023 and immediately bought the 40 day workbook. God's timing is always perfect. Before I'd started reading the book, I'd been feeling so frustrated with dieting. I belonged to a diet program for many years, but was hardly following it any longer. A negative body image and trying hard to defeat it was something I had focused on my entire adult life and had even started in high school. And I guess I'd have to say even as a child. So after so long I admit that I was a bit skeptical about a book that promised to change in my life yet again, but I am here to tell you that I feel lighter emotionally and mentally and though this is still a journey for me and it's it's gonna be a journey for a while, I truly have hope that I will achieve long lasting freedom from body image bondage. And most of all, reading this book and listening to Heather's podcast have increased my bible reading time, practicing my faith, and I feel like I'm truly breaking free from the bondage of body image.

[00:01:31]:

Oh, I love to hear stories like that. Yay. Yay. Yay. Thanks so much. And that was another participant who read the book and joined our well, she actually joined a coaching group and then went back and did the 40 day journey later. But our 40 day journey starts, like, next week, friend. And if you're not listening to this in real time and you're, like, a week behind, it's okay.

[00:01:51]:

You can join the group a week late. Even 2 weeks late, you can watch the replay. And join us on the 40 day journey so you can start to taste freedom like she did. Hey. Today, we're gonna talk about what to do if it's your own thoughts that are driving you crazy. Right? So last time we talked about what to do if you're afraid other people are thinking bad thoughts about you, if you're afraid other people are judging you. But what if it's just your own thoughts, your own view of you that you really need to fix? Your thought life is dragging you down. Today and on Friday, we are gonna talk about what to do.

[00:02:25]:

Four points I'm gonna give you, and I think you're gonna find it really helpful. I'm glad you're here for it today. Let's get right to it. Welcome to Compared to Who, the podcast to help you make peace with your body so you can savor God's rest and feel his love. If you're tired of fighting body image the world's way, Compared to Who is the show for you. You've likely heard lots of talk about loving your body, but my goal is different. Striving to fall in love with stretch marks and cellulite is a little silly to me. Instead, I want to encourage you and remind you with the truth of scripture that you are seen, you are known, and you are loved no matter what your size or shape.

[00:03:06]:

Here, the pressure is off. If you're looking for real talk, biblical encouragement, and regular reminders that God loves you and you're not alone, you've come to the right place. I hope you enjoy today's show, and, hey, tell a friend about it. Well, hey. I'm Heather Creekmore, and I'm glad you are listening to the Compare To Who Show today. If you're brand new to the show, hey. Welcome. We're so glad you're here.

[00:03:32]:

You can go to improve body image.com and find out more about me and about the topics we talk about on this podcast and really all the different books and opportunities that we have for you if you are a Christian woman who struggles with body image to find some freedom. And we're a little different than other programs and places out there, so I hope you'll dig in and read the testimonies of women that have been listening to this show and involved with what we do here at compared to who and on improved body image dot com and are finding body image freedom. So, hey, I'm glad you're here. And if you've been around a while, I'm really glad you're here because today we got something good going on. Four ways to stop negative thoughts about your body. 

Don’t Believe Everything You Think

[00:04:18]:

And I was gonna call this episode, don't believe everything you think. Okay. That's like one of my favorite quotes. I think I made it up, but I'm not 100% sure. So I won't give myself credit for that because there may be someone else who said this online somewhere. But don't believe everything you think. I write about this in the 40 day body image journey, but I think this is a pivotal concept. So last time, we talked just a smidge about how, like, fear and anxious thoughts are part of our nervous system and how, I don't know, I think even as Christians, we've been kinda taught, like, you stamp them down, like, you shouldn't have anxious thoughts. You shouldn't have fear. And that's true to some degree, but then to another degree, like, this is just the way our bodies work.

[00:05:06]:

We do have anxious thoughts. We do have fears. The thing that we really need to intervene in is not when the thoughts happen, but it's, like, what happens after we have the thoughts. Right? So it's instead of being, like, oh, anxious thoughts, bad, must, like, stamp them out. It's, like, no. Anxious thoughts, natural. Now what do I do? Do I try to fix things because of this anxious thought? Do I try to make sure I'm safe by doing this and this and this? And, oh, do I just panic because I wanna make this anxious thought go away? Or do I say anxious thought? That's interesting. I wonder why I have an anxious thought about this.

[00:05:47]:

Oh, I have an anxious thought about this because, well, this is something I've been afraid of for a really long time. Okay. Well, what do I do with that fear? Well, the Bible tells me what to do with fear. So maybe I, you know, follow what scripture commands. And I think about what the truth is, what God's truth is compared to my truth. And so it's, like, just a completely different way of tackling our thought life and this topic of, like, anxiety and anxious thoughts. So I hope this is gonna be super helpful to you today. And this is stuff, so I was on a little break this summer.

[00:06:24]:

I miss you guys, and I'm glad you're back. But I was on a break this summer. And during my break, I decided I would just, like, read a lot and listen to a lot of resources. And I really just wanted to, like, further equip and educate myself around some of these topics that are related to, maybe tangentially related to our body image issues. And one of those big topics, of course, is our thought lives. Right? One of the biggest things women come to me with when they wanna be coached is, like, I'm driving myself crazy. Because all I think about is my body and my size and my weight and my food. And I just have no idea how to make all those thoughts stop.

[00:07:07]:

If there was a switch to turn them off, I would have done it by now. I thought I could turn them off when I changed my size. I thought I could turn them off when I lost the weight or got the surgery. Like, I thought I could turn them off when I fix them and they're still there and I don't know what to do, but my brain feels out of control. And if that's where you're at today, oh, friend, you are in the right place. Because that's what we're gonna talk about. Right? And so first, I want you to feel completely affirmed that if your thoughts are obsessive like that, you are not alone. Now I know the enemy is telling you you're alone because that was my story.

[00:07:47]:

I don't know if you've read my story. I write my story, my body image journey is written in my book, Compared to Who, But I talk about how my mind was constantly thinking about my body and my size and how to change it, like, 24/7. Now I don't think anyone knew that. That wasn't something I shared openly. I wasn't like, oh, I'm sorry. I didn't hear you because I was thinking about what to eat for lunch or what I ate for lunch and how to burn it off. Like, I don't think I was obvious with it. It was very subtle.

[00:08:17]:

In fact, I would say it was like a secret, a secret sin, a secret obsession, a secret addiction even. I was the only one who knew what I was thinking about all the time, but it was a problem. And it was a problem that I truly believed I would fix if I just got a better body. But if you read my story, you know I actually was doing okay on the body side, you know, empirically, I suppose. Like, I became a fitness instructor, like, you know, I was okay, and it was never enough. I could never get to the point where I was satisfied. And some of you can relate to that. Others of you have, you know, never felt like it was okay.

The Overwhelm of Taking Thoughts Captive

[00:09:00]:

And so you are still maybe believing that, oh, yeah. I hear you, Heather. But if I could just get to okay, then it would be different for me. No, friend. It actually probably wouldn't. And I hate to burst your bubble on that, but it's just the truth. So how do we change the negative thoughts about our bodies? How do we stop thinking these negative thoughts? Well, you know, scripture tells us to take every thought captive, but what does that even mean? Right? It's kind of interesting that scripture says it that directly to “take it captive”. Like, captive means, like, isolation.

[00:09:38]:

Right? Like, it's trapped. Like, it is in a cage. Something in captivity is no longer free. And so if you think about all these thoughts I mean, for me, it was, like, hundreds and hundreds of thoughts. Like, trying to think about taking captive is kinda like I don't know if you've seen, like, the Jurassic Park or the Jurassic World movies, but I got a bunch of dinosaur loving boys. So I've seen them all dozens of times, I'm afraid. But I just picture in Jurassic World where, like, all of the, oh, what is it? They're they're pterodactyls, I think they are. My dinosaur knowledge should really be better than this.

[00:10:15]:

But, like, all the pterodactyls get free from the bird aviary. And there are just pterodactyls everywhere. And it's like, you know, Chris Pratt's, like, trying to shoot a couple of them to take them down, but there's just so many. I feel like that's kinda what's going on inside my head. Like, there's just pterodactyls everywhere. And so to take thoughts captive, it's like, you know, I can, like, maybe grab 1 or 2, but, like, oh goodness. There's, like, 500 in there. Like, how can I put them all in a cage? Like, that can feel overwhelming.

[00:10:45]:

And so to some degree, when I work with women in coaching and really even starting our 40 day journey is really, I would say, your entry level point. If you've ever thought about coaching, the 40 day journey is where you wanna start. Because then you get to see, like, do you like me? Are you comfortable with me? One of my other coaches is normally involved too. Like, are you comfortable with her? Do you like being in community talking about this? You can actually feel and experience, like, the freedom that comes when you share just even a smidgey smidge about what you're going through, and you hear another woman say, oh, yeah. I have the same experience. I have that same thought. Right? So there's so much good stuff that happens in those groups in those coaching groups where you can start to identify those thoughts before you even try to take them captive. But one thing I like to say is that, like, we start to turn down the noise a little bit when we can say things like, oh, I have that thought, and, like, she said she had that thought, and she said, oh, maybe everyone has that thought.

[00:11:41]:

Maybe I don't really have to give that thought that much power. Like, I can just kinda turn the volume down. That thought was like a 10. I'm gonna turn that volume down to, like, a 2. I don't have to pay that much attention to that thought. And that's a good start. But, again, scripture says to take it captive. So how do we do that? I'm gonna dig into the four points of how to do that and really what to do if your thought life is overwhelming you.

Diet Culture’s Shame Motivated Mantras

[00:12:08]:

Before we go too much further, I wanna just very briefly tackle a concept that I think a lot of us who have body image issues wrestle with, and that is we have so many negative thoughts and we are so mistrusting of ourselves and our own like, we mistrust that we can actually come up with thoughts that are good for us. So it's like we're driven instead by these negative thoughts. Like, these negative thoughts are what are gonna motivate me to be a better person. These negative thoughts are what are actually helping me. And let me just call something out that I call out in my 40 day book, my 40 day body image workbook. Right? Negative thoughts are not of the Lord. Right? Like, of course, like, you know, God can, that might be worded in a way that's too broad. Right? Like, of course, like, God can show us, like, oh, that's a bad thing for you or whatever, and that could be perceived as negative.

[00:13:03]:

That's not what we're talking about. Right? But these thoughts about yourself that don't align with what God would say about you, those are not from the Lord. So if you are constantly having thoughts about yourself that you are worthless, you are unlovable, you are unworthy, you are a lazy slob who doesn't deserve, you know, for anyone to love her ever. Like, whatever those mean, harsh, condemning, shame filled words are that you are hearing in your head, know that those are not of God. Okay? Now here's where it gets tricky. A lot of us have been in diet culture for a long time. And let me define diet culture if you've never heard that term before, because I know a lot of women haven't. Diet culture really just means that we live in an era and an age and a culture that values thinness, that idolizes thinness, that believes that thinness equals health, that believes that thinness equals what makes someone valuable, and worthwhile, and worthy of love.

[00:14:07]:

Right? So this is the air that we breathe. This is the kind of culture we live in. Hundreds and hundreds of years ago, actually, probably only needed, like, one of those hundreds, maybe 2 tops. Right? It used to be that if you were fatter, you were more valuable because people knew you were wealthier, you could afford food, you could eat better, you were healthier because you were heavier. And we've just turned that on its head, and that's a whole other episode. Right? But we live in this diet culture that teaches these principles that this is how one makes themselves worthy of love. And so out of this diet culture comes all of these shaming thoughts, words, expressions. Right? And if you've done any popular diet programs, you've probably adopted a lot of these mantras, like, you know, a moment on the lips, forever on the hips.

[00:15:00]:

You know? Like and not that there's anything necessarily inherently evil about that statement, but it's meant to be a shaming statement. Right? These are sentiments, thoughts, and shaming words that are meant to encourage you to eat or behave a certain way so that you will have a certain body. So it is shame motivated mantras that you are supposed to repeat. And, really, you're supposed to put them in your head. Right? So it becomes you know, scripture tells us to, like, hide God's word in our heart, but most of us have, like, these principles from diet culture hidden in our hearts. Right? So when we see a food that is, quote, unquote, bad, we, like, think of that a moment on the lips forever on the hips. We think that, and that shames us out of eating it or whatever is how it's supposed to work, or we eat it anyway, and then we feel more shame as that mantra, like, swirls around our head. But here's the problem with all of that, my friend.

[00:15:56]:

Right? Like, a lot of us have a lot of these shameful thoughts and mantras and sayings that we live by. But who are we agreeing with when we keep those shameful, condemning thoughts around? Like, a lot of us are afraid to think that we're okay, you know, that we're worthy, that our bodies are okay, that our bodies are even good. We're afraid to think that because we are afraid that we will no longer be motivated to change our bodies or to put effort into taking care of our bodies if we feel like our bodies are okay. So instead, we agree with, oh, follow me here. Oh, Friend. Hard. Hard. Hard.

[00:16:41]:

We agree with the devil. We make the enemy of our soul our weight loss accountability partner. We make the enemy of our soul our shame filled or shame throwing, I guess I should say, fitness coach. And we tell the truth of God and God's word to shove it because we're afraid of resting in what God offers as truth and acceptance and love. Because we're afraid that if we accept that God says our body is good, then we might get lazy and fat and not like the way our bodies look anymore. So we have to agree with the enemy and let the enemy be our weight loss accountability partner. Like, friend, that's pretty messed up. I don't know if you ever thought about that before.

Why Just Changing Your Thoughts Won’t Work

[00:17:32]:

But if you're allowing all of these shame filled condemning thoughts to swirl in your head because you think they're helping you, they are not. And it will never be enough to make them go away. So let's get to the 4 points for today. Four ideas I have for you. Fundamentally, I want you to realize, this is number 1, that you have more than just a thought problem, you have a heart problem. I'm gonna read for you Romans 8:5. And this is the New Living Translation.

[00:18:05]:

“Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things. But those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the spirit.” Here's another scripture, Matthew 15:19. “For from the heart come evil thoughts.” Friend, I know you wanna shut your brain up first. You wanna work on your brain. Like, you come to me for coaching. You say, Heather, I just wanna fix my head.

[00:18:32]:

I wanna fix my thought life. And, friend, I appreciate that. Right? Because that's a problem you feel, but you've gotta fix your heart first. This is a heart problem. What you believe will determine how you think. And you cannot Jedi mind trick, you know, new age mantra manifest things by saying things. You cannot do that in a way that will effectively cure your thought life. Because even if you can Jedi mind trick it to, like, okay.

[00:19:09]:

Stop the thought. I'm gonna think something else. I'm gonna think some like, eventually, what is in your heart will come out because that's what scripture tells us will happen. What you believe will override what you think every single time. So change your heart first and friend, again, that's why I invite you to join us on the 40 day journey because that's what we work on. I'm gonna talk about your thought life a little bit there, but we're really gonna work on what you believe. You need a renewed heart before you can have a renewed mind.

[00:19:38]:

And most of us just want a robotic approach to, like, our thought life problems. We just like, okay. Just tell me a b c, and I'll fix it, a b c. But, no, we gotta fix: what do you believe about your value? What do you believe about your worth? Do you believe your body is good, that you were made in the image of God? Like, we almost have to go back to that kind of basics and then build from there. And it might feel super basic at first. Like, maybe you've got the 40 day body image workbook, and you're like, it's so basic. Yeah. Keep reading, friend.

[00:20:06]:

Keep reading. It's gonna get real deep real fast. But we gotta start at the beginning. Where are you coming from? Do you actually believe God created you? Like, that's a big issue in this day and age because we weren't, a lot of us weren't, taught that in school. Right? But if you don't believe that God created you, then you really can't believe that you have a purpose and that he cares about you and that, you know, he actually created you on purpose for a purpose. So, really digging into your belief systems, your worldview, your belief systems, impacts your body image so much more than you would ever believe they do. Because culture tells us really that all that impacts your body image is the size you wear and how good your skin is and whether or not you have wrinkles at age 50. Right? No.

Expose The Values Beneath Our Thoughts

[00:20:48]:

No. No. No. It's “what do you believe?”. Okay? Point 2. Scripture says to take every thought captive. It's 2nd Corinthians 10:5. But I wanna back up just a couple verses and read for you starting really in verse 1.

[00:21:05]:

“By the humility and gentleness of Christ, I appeal to you. I, Paul, who am timid when face to face with you, but bold towards you when away. I beg you that when I come, I may not have to be as bold as I expect to be towards some people who think that we live by the standards of this world. For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. And we will be ready to punish every act of disobedience once your obedience is complete.”

[00:21:52]:

Verse 7, “you are judging by appearances. If anyone is confident that they belong to Christ, they should consider again that we belong to Christ just as much as they do. So even if I boast somewhat freely about the authority the Lord gave us for building you up rather than tearing you down, I will not be ashamed of it. I do not want to seem to be trying to frighten you with my letters.” And he goes on, but verse 12 is where I wanna get to here. “We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.” Friend, what's going on here, it's not just about taking thoughts captive.

[00:22:35]:

It absolutely is. Scripture is telling us to take those captive. But it's telling us to take those captive in this context of Paul explaining that we are not of the world, that the world has this whole other economy of the way that it sees things should be and the way we should see things and the way we should do things. And the world values appearances, and the world values, you know, this and success and wealth. And we don't try to win the world's battles in the world's ways. We are of a different kingdom and we have a different way of fighting. We have a different way of winning, and we win when we stop thinking about things in worldly ways. And so friends, this concept of taking a thought captive is more than just putting it in a little cage.

[00:23:30]:

Like I said, you have to ask yourself, what do I really believe? Do I really believe God's word is true, or do I believe what the world's economy is telling me is true? And then second, you are taking it captive because you realize, oh, wait a second. Even if I do, like, do what that thought is prompting me to do, even if I keep that thought around, like I said, for weight loss inspiration or fitspiration. Right? If I keep that thought because I think it's helping me, it's helping me do things the world's way, not God's way. It's leading me further away from obedience to him and keeping me in the world's economy where I'm really doing things, like he said in verse 12. Right? I'm just comparing myself with myself or comparing, you know, myself to the self I was, you know, a couple years ago. Right? You hear that all the time. Right? It's foolishness.

[00:24:28]:

It's foolishness because that's not how God sets his standard for us. God's standard for us is holiness, not whether or not you did better last year than you're doing this year, this year than you're doing last year. Right? No. No. No. He's saying, for his holiness and guess what? It's impossible to meet without Jesus. Right? Jesus is the only one who can bridge that gap between us and the standard of holiness that God sets for us. I'll never be holy enough on my own.

Choose Obedience And Speak Truth

[00:24:57]:

I'll never be good enough on my own. It's only through Jesus. And so Jesus becomes the one who fills that gap for me. And if I am stuck in the world's economy thinking, well, at least I made myself look good. Well, you know, at least I am successful and goal oriented and driven, and I've gotten this and this and this and this and this. God's standard is not all of the things on my to do list. God's standard is obedience to him. And Paul is giving the Corinthians a little bit of a hard time because they, like, received the gospel and became Christians, and then they kinda just, like, went off on their own way and did all kinds of crazy things.

[00:25:35]:

Right? So he's had to be kinda tough on them in his letter because he's trying to bring them back to the gospel, trying to remind them that we don't do things as Christians the way the world does. And so going back to the end of that chapter, second Corinthians chapter 10. Let me go now to verse 17. Actually, verse 16. So we can preach the gospel in the regions beyond you. For we do not want to boast about work already done in someone else's territory, but let the one who boasts, boast in the lord. Verse 18. For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends.

[00:26:09]:

And this is where I wanna leave you today, friend. A lot of these negative thoughts you have that we need to take captive are thoughts that are you trying to earn your own approval. They are you trying to commend yourself. They are you trying to make yourself good enough for you, for your standards. It's my truth. I wanna live by my truth. My truth is Heather would feel better if Heather weighed this amount and looked like this and had this kinda house. And so I am shamed by these negative thoughts that tell me that I need to meet a standard, and that standard is not God's standard.

[00:26:55]:

It's my own standard. I make myself an idol, and I make these thoughts, idolatrous thoughts, that really run my life. As my friend, they can't stay. Right? You have to take them captive. You have to preach the gospel to yourself. I heard this amazing quote by Tim Keller the other day. And it was talking about all these doubts we have, but how we're so willing to listen to the doubts. Right? We're so willing to listen to the negative thoughts.

[00:27:31]:

And we have to be more willing to listen to the truth, God's positive, helpful, life giving truth than we are to entertaining negative thoughts from the enemy that will steal, kill, and destroy. And Keller said it this way. He said, that's what faith is. Faith is deciding to tell the doubts to be quiet so that you can speak the truth yourself. He said it actually like this. He said, like, that, doubt is listening to your heart and faith is telling your heart God's truth. Are you doing that today, friend? You can take your thoughts captive after you've embraced the faith to tell your heart the truth from God's word. So those are our first two points.

[00:28:24]:

We're gonna get to the second two points, these four ways to take negative thoughts and get rid of them, change the way you think about your body. We're going to tackle those next two on Friday. I hope you'll come back for it. And I really hope today something has helped you stop comparing and start living. Bye bye. Compared To Who Podcast is proud to be part of the Life Audio Podcast Network. For more great Christian podcasts, go to life audio.com.

[00:28:48]:

And, oh, hey. I have a brand new Etsy shop. Go to compare to you on Etsy and look for cute tints and teas you will love.