Strategies to Stop Comparing Yourself to Other People (Group Chat Part 2) [Podcast Transcript]

Title: Strategies to Stop Comparing Yourself to Other People (Group Chat Part 2/2)

Podcast Date: November 8, 2024

Listen Here: 

Description

Today Heather Creekmore and her incredible team at Compared to Who? dive deep into the world of comparison, uncovering personal stories, strategies, and biblical insights to illuminate the path to freedom from comparing.

Rachel shares her experience as a worship leader facing comparison in front of teenagers, discovering the power of "bless and not impress" with divine assistance. Tara reflects on her journey of overcoming body image dissatisfaction through spiritual growth, and Jackie emphasizes honesty with oneself and loved ones. Presli explores the role of growing her faith in handling her comparison and self-image struggles.

The team delves into the heart of their comparison issues, likening it to idolatry and proposing grace as the remedy. Heather emphasizes the importance of shaking off societal pressures and instead aiming for spiritual growth and sanctification. Jackie's approach to curating a healthier social media experience and Rachel's use of the "pause app" are practical tools shared with listeners.

Together, they address the tendency to compare with past selves, encouraging a shift from self-centeredness to serving others. Heather introduces listeners to her book, "The Comparison Free Life," as a resource for understanding grace and breaking free from the comparison trap, inviting them to explore it for deeper insight.

For more meaningful episodes and resources, visit improvebodyimage.com. Tune in to Part 1 for the beginning of this transformative discussion and stay connected as Heather and her team continue to tackle the nuances of comparison and body image challenges on "Compared to Who?" with love, truth, and authenticity.

Be sure to check out Heather's book, "The Comparison Free Life", to accompany you on this journey towards freedom from comparison.

Transcript

Disclaimer: This transcript is AI-generated and has not been edited for accuracy or clarity.

Heather Creekmore [00:00:04]:

Hey, friend. Heather Creekmore here. Are you sick of comparing yourself to others? I mean, maybe you don't even know you're doing it. But do you always feel like you're behind, or maybe there's something wrong with you? Or maybe you should just be doing better, and you resolve every Monday morning to do better, and then Friday or Saturday feel like you've gone right back to the same old spot again? Oh, friend. I get it. That's why I want you to read my brand new book, The Comparison Free Life. Yes. If you read The Burden of Better, you've already read this book.

Heather Creekmore [00:00:36]:

But if you haven't, The Comparison Free Life is really a guide to how you can stop comparing. And it's not Jedi mind tricks. It's not like, just tell yourself you're happy for the other person. I don't believe in any of that. This gets to the heart of the truth of scripture about why we compare, what's really going in in our hearts that makes us compare, and then how do we believe what the Bible says so that we can stop comparing and actually live a life of joy, peace, and rest like God intended for us to live no matter what our circumstances. So go grab a copy, the comparison free life available now on Amazon or wherever you get your Christian books. Hey, today, we're continuing my conversation with my team for fabulous women, and we're talking about comparison. And today, we get into kind of what our own strategies are so we don't spend as much time weighed down by comparison, how we found freedom.

Heather Creekmore [00:01:39]:

I think you're really gonna enjoy it. So I'm glad you're here. Hey. If you're brand new to the show, welcome. This is a second part of a 2 part episode, so go listen to Tuesday's episode. That'll help you figure out a little bit better where we are in the conversation. But if you're brand new to the show, go to improve body image.com. You can learn all about what we do here at compared to who.

Heather Creekmore [00:01:58]:

There, you can find fan favorite episodes, episodes that will tell you more about all of the ways that compared to who we try to help encourage you to live life on purpose for a purpose and figure out who God made you to be without stressing over body image and comparison. So glad you're here. Improvebodyimage.com can answer all your questions. Let's get to today's show. Welcome to Compare To Who, the podcast to help you make peace with your body so you can savor God's rest and feel his love. If you're tired of fighting body image the world's way, Compare To You is the show for you. You've likely heard lots of talk about loving your body, but my goal is different. Striving to fall in love with stretch marks and cellulite is a little silly to me.

Heather Creekmore [00:02:45]:

Instead, I want to encourage you and remind you with the truth of scripture that you are seen, you are known, and you are loved no matter what your size or shape. Here, the pressure is off. If you're looking for real talk, biblical encouragement, and regular reminders that God loves you and you're not alone, You've come to the right place. I hope you enjoy today's show, and, hey, tell a friend about it. Okay. Let's let's change let's change course for the second part of this. How has God shown up for you in your comparison issues? What has he done? What is he showing you? How have things changed for you?

Rachel [00:03:26]:

Well, for me, I am a worship leader and I am surrounded by teenagers and students all the time, which is hilarious because if you asked me a couple years ago, the most terrified place I would be, I would say in front of teenagers and students. And I didn't think that we could do that. But since my husband's a student pastor and we used to be in a worship band that traveled, and now I am the worship leader for our student ministry with about 500 kiddos. I mean, every Wednesday, I have to go. I have to face my fears of standing in front of teenagers because I realized when when I'm around them, I'm comparing myself to them. And my friend, Erin Todd, you guys all know her and love her. She goes, Rachel, it is straight up ridiculous for you to compare yourself to a teenager. And I was like, you know, I really needed to hear that from you because you're right.

Rachel [00:04:17]:

Like they're 16, 17, 18 and I am 42. A mom of 3. I mean we are not the same. So but every Wednesday I still have to face that fear of rejection. It takes me back to my high school insecurities because you know high school is just all about appearances. Who am I friends with? What am I wearing? Who am I dating? You know? And so, it's so funny, but God is, like, he's, like, making me face those fears over and over and over every Wednesday. So, like, even today, this is Wednesday the day that we're doing this. Tonight I will walk in to our huge student ministry room and before I do, the Lord has just taught me these things.

Rachel [00:04:52]:

I heard a beautiful quote. I think it was by Leslie Schilling. She said, my goal is to bless and not impress. And that kinda goes with the like, there you are instead of like, here I am. So I'll sit in my car and just take a deep breath. Kinda do a transition from my day because I got I'm a mom of 3 girls and all the things. And I just breathe out. I'm like, Lord, I'm here tonight to bless and not impress.

Rachel [00:05:15]:

I do not need anything from these students. Like, I am here

Heather Creekmore [00:05:18]:

Love that.

Heather Creekmore [00:05:19]:

To try to show them you. And so when I walk in the room, if I literally am thinking about them rather than has a shirt look do I look? Do I look like I'm gay? They don't care. They're not evaluating me. They don't they'll say, like, you're a mom. We don't even know what you wear. Like, one of them said that. I was like, you are right. You know? But I just get to go in there with that mentality, remembering that they need from me to see a free woman walking in freedom with Christ, not someone who is obsessing about what I eat and weigh and wear.

Heather Creekmore [00:05:49]:

And so the but the Lord has done that because if you would have talked to me even a year ago, I would have been stressing about what I was gonna wear tonight, what I was gonna look like on stage because I tend to compare myself to people on stage. And, Heather, you yourself in the the comparison free life talk about that in the very first thing. You're, like, she was on stage. And you were evaluating her and I'm like Mhmm.

Jackie [00:06:09]:

That's what people do if you're

Heather Creekmore [00:06:10]:

on a stage. And so I was like, but now I go, it's okay because I am I'm learning to rest in Jesus. But it has taken just God and his power doing that in me. So there's no way I could have done that for my own self.

Heather Creekmore [00:06:24]:

Yeah. Well, I'm thinking about well, two things. First of all, it's not Leslie Schilling's quote. I just wanna make sure. Rochelle Aparm

Heather Creekmore [00:06:29]:

gets credit

Heather Creekmore [00:06:31]:

For that Leslie Schilling is awesome, but Rachella Parham wrote that. And that was a beautiful line, blessed not impressed. So I just wanna make sure Thank

Heather Creekmore [00:06:37]:

you for correcting that. I was reading too many books at once.

Heather Creekmore [00:06:40]:

But, but isn't it silly? Right? Because it's an imaginary contest. Right? Like, you Yes. Kind of feel like someone in the crowd is comparing themselves to you. Right? And the person in the crowd actually doesn't think the person on stage is comparing themselves to them. So it's like this just imaginary contest that you're trying to win, and you never actually can win because it's not a real contest. Right? But but it continues. Like, yeah. Yeah.

Heather Creekmore [00:07:10]:

That's good.

Tara [00:07:11]:

Oh, it's so good, Rachel. And it just made me think too, like, I was thinking back to my story, and I'm, I was thinking about how and you say it in your, compares comparison free life, and that comparison is really an issue of the heart. Right? And I feel like that really, really I got to live through that because when I first came to you, I was in a very, very small body compared to, you know, compared to where I am now. And I'm doing quotes here, because I think that's also such a danger. Right? We we compare ourselves to who we used to be. We compare ourselves at different points in our life, and we don't give ourselves grace for aging because the because our culture doesn't. But that's a whole another story. But for me, it was coming in with, with at the time, really what a cultural, more of what a cultural ideal body would be like.

Tara [00:08:06]:

It didn't matter. I didn't, I was so miserable. It was never good enough. I, I kept, you know, meeting the goal and the goal would keep changing. And I kept pushing more and further and went further into an eating disorder. And, so throughout this healing process of freedom, my body has changed. My body has changed significantly. And I remember realizing that like as I gained freedom and as I started to walk in the love and just learning my identity in Christ, it was like I was more miserable and comparing more when I was in that small body than I am now, you know, in a much larger body not fitting the cultural idea.

Tara [00:08:47]:

And like you said Rachel, it is all an act, a grace, a love, a mercy of God. And I remember one time in particular that was such a, I think it was such a turning point for me. And it makes me think of your story too, Rachel, is I was supposed to be helping my kids. My son had a field trip and I was gonna be chaperoning. And I've always loved to volunteer and I've always loved to be part of a school and be in their lives. And but it was always like, what do I wear? What do people think of me? I mean, it was about me, me, me, me, me. I was always so wrapped up in all of that. And I remember, I hadn't seen a lot of these teachers and people since my body had changed.

Tara [00:09:26]:

So they had known me and seen me in a much smaller body and now I was about to see them after a whole summer coming back to school and I was terrified. What are they gonna think? And Heather, you did an awesome podcast about that too, which was so good recently. But, like, what are they gonna think? They're gonna think less of me and the comparison started to happen. Now I really I'm I'm not gonna win at the comparison game. And it was such a beautiful moment because immediately I was able to see from, you know, reading your book and doing the work like, oh my gosh, what if I just went and what if I just loved on them? What if I, what if I didn't think about me? What if I just went out and found someone to encourage, found someone to speak something kind over them? What if I went and loved on the kids? What if I just had fun? Like, we were going hiking, and I love to, like, hike and move. And so, of course, there I am thinking, well, I'm in a larger body now, and my pants are really tight. And what if I'm hiking up the mountain and someone's lower than me, and they have to look at me? You know? And it's like, that's where our minds go. And then it was such a gift to be able to say, oh my gosh.

Tara [00:10:38]:

But God, like, it's not about me. More of you, less of me, and that became such a well, like, mantra throughout my healing. And it was such a shift when I just got down on my knees and I surrendered and I asked the Lord like God who can I be a light to? What do you have for me? How can I serve you? How can I love? I went and I had the best time. I loved on people. I had this most beautiful conversation with my, son's teacher who actually shared that she was struggling with comparison.

Heather Creekmore [00:11:07]:

She

Tara [00:11:07]:

was feeling less than as a teacher. She was feeling like she wasn't measuring up. She was worried about what parents were thinking of her. I got love on her. I got to share with her. The kids were so much fun. Like, they all wanted to be in my group because I was just the fun mom having a blast. Couldn't have done any of that if I had stayed wrapped up in me.

Tara [00:11:27]:

And I left feeling more joy and more peace. And I realized that I went a whole, like, I don't know, 4 or 5 hours, and I didn't think about my body once. That's just awesome. Yeah. It was so good. And, again, that's the holy spirit, but it's like, I wouldn't even have known to go to that and see. I wouldn't even have understood that there's a different way and there's a better way because unless I had, you know, done this work and walked this path. So

Heather Creekmore [00:11:56]:

Oh, I love it. Thanks for sharing that, Sarah. Yeah. It's Tim Keller, the freedom of self forgetfulness. Right? It's not self neglect, but you really do not have to walk around all the time thinking about yourself and how you compare to other people. Right? You just don't you don't. I mean, a lot of us do, but you don't have to stay there.

Jackie [00:12:19]:

I think part of a big part of this journey for me has been just growing in honesty, and that honesty is with both myself and with other people. And, I can speak to so many different areas, but I I think what what comes to mind specifically is in in my marriage. I think when I have those days where let's I see a photo of myself and I'm like, panicking. Like, oh my goodness. And I think the honesty is just catching the feeling before it turns to, okay, I need to go on a diet. But catching like, oh, okay. Let me get curious about this. What's going on? What am I feeling? I feel unsafe.

Jackie [00:12:57]:

Like, that photo makes me feel unsafe because I think being at that size is unsafe, and I'm worried what my husband thinks of me. And I think recognizing that in like, seeing that feeling and bringing that to God, like, wow. I feel really unsafe, God. Like, I need you to come and help me with that. And then also being honest with my husband and saying, hey. I saw this photo of myself, and I'm feeling really terrible. And I need I need you to just, like, love on me today. And that takes a lot of humility because for a long time in our and we're not married that long, but it was like I couldn't tell him things like that because I needed him to figure it out on his own.

Jackie [00:13:36]:

Otherwise, I was too needy. I couldn't ask for that kind of love that I needed and comfort that I needed. And so this honesty of being like, it's okay if I ask him for that. It's okay if I come to God with this. Like, just it's okay. And I think, like, I think, Rachel, you said earlier, like, when you're like that with other people too where you can just say something to them that's so freeing to them to then share. Like, hey. I feel that way too.

Jackie [00:14:01]:

And it really helps us connect. Yeah. Helps my husband and I connect and helps me then connect to other women as well who struggle with the same things.

Heather Creekmore [00:14:09]:

Yeah. That's so good. That's so good. Well, C. S. Lewis says, the moment friendship is born when it's when you share something, you say, oh, I thought it was just me. So that's the Heather interpretation of CS Lewis. He said it much more eloquently than that.

Heather Creekmore [00:14:22]:

But, Presley, what do you think?

Presli [00:14:24]:

Yeah. For me, I feel like it really clicked for me, how to deal with my comparison issues and, like, obsessively working it out and counting calories. Don't even have to talk to my family because I'm so busy counting my calories. And god forbid, they interrupt a workout because then I can't stand it, and then I'm gonna be abusive. So, yeah, I think understanding the gospel more because, like, in in previous podcasts and other things, you had said how your belief is really related to the struggles with your body image. And I I didn't get that for a while, but it's like then I try to remind myself, like, yeah, if I'm if I am I really believing right now? Because if I'm really believing in Jesus and eternity, am I really gonna be worried that my legs are cottage cheesy or, you know, whatever, my arms are flappy or whatever? Is that really gonna be a huge issue? So, yeah, I think just understanding the gospel more for me, and I've been crying for the Holy Spirit to help me really embody and feel God's love and work through feelings. Like, on both both sides of the coin, like, learning how to not obsessively count calories and also learning not to bury myself in a tub of ice cream every night. So, I mean, it's it's hard with the black and white thinking to get out of that and find, like, what does the Lord have for me? It's not about me.

Heather Creekmore [00:15:47]:

Yeah. Yeah. I love that you brought up the black and white thinking at the end because that's exactly what I was gonna say. Like like, it's about finding grace. Right? And and the 40 day body image workbook I talk about, like, we don't need to live in the gray between the black and white. We need to live in the grace is one of the chapters in there. Like, that's that's kind of what's missing in all of our comparison struggles. I mean, really that's what I didn't realize this was gonna be a commercial for the comparison free life book.

Heather Creekmore [00:16:20]:

Sense is kinda gone there. But no. Like, that's that's what that book is about. I mean, when I when I was asked to write a book on comparison, I had people reaching out to me saying, okay, we're we're doing better on body image. Thank you for compared to who. But we kinda thought compared to who was gonna be about comparison. So now can you write a book on comparison? And I was like, like, what's a cure for comparison? I was like, sure. I have no idea what the cure for comparison is.

Heather Creekmore [00:16:47]:

It's like, okay. I don't know. Do I know the answer to that? And, you know, as I just prayed about it and, like, I really couldn't I mean, I was trying to research. Like, I I may have actually put into Google what is the cure for comparison and found, like, just all this self focused stuff. Like, you can stop comparing when you just decide that you're good enough. And, like, you decide that no one else matters, and it's just about you. And the only person you have to compare yourself to is you, and you just have to be better than you were yesterday. And, like all this just like self, self, self pride, pride, pride.

Heather Creekmore [00:17:22]:

And I was like, okay, I know that's not the answer. That cannot be the answer. And as I started digging into it, it's like, well, we compare because we idealize like that woman and objectify, like we talked about, like we idealize that thing she has with that body she has, or that husband like marriage she has. Right. And when we idealize, we idolize. And so really we're stuck in comparison because of all these idols we've erected in our lives. And then really the only way to break free, like in addition to, you know, confessing and repenting of the idolatry it's recognizing that every single thing that I have and am is a result of God's grace. Yeah.

Heather Creekmore [00:18:08]:

Right? And so my body is the way it is because of God's grace. And God doesn't love me more or less than her if she wears a size 4 and I not close to that. Right? Like that's not that's not a like relative spectrum where God's like, oh, I'm gonna pour all of my love on her because she, you know, like it's he has the same amount of great, tremendous grace for me. And then the other thing I was thinking about was just this reality of like in Philippians, we're told that Jesus emptied himself of his glory when he came, like he was equal to God, but when he came to earth, right, he could have come as like mister amazing. I mean, he was mister amazing, but like physical appearance, you know, like he, he could have been a rock star where everyone wanted to look at him, everyone to be like him. Like, he could have made himself really attractive in all these physical ways that our culture, and even the cultures back then valued to some degree. Right? It was different. But to some degree, like scripture tells us, like, back in the old Testament, the soul was a good looking guy.

Heather Creekmore [00:19:17]:

Right? And David was a good looking guy. Right? Saul was big and strong. David was small, but that they were both good looking. Right? So there was something I mean, people were people and they noticed attractive people and admired attractive people. Right? And Jesus could have done that, and he didn't. And then it's like, who do I wanna be like? Do I wanna be like a Kardashian, or do I wanna be like Jesus? Like, what am I trying to do? I don't know. What do you guys think?

Tara [00:19:46]:

Oh my gosh, Heather. I love that. I'm so glad you brought up the grace because I was like, my heart was just going there too because that is such a I I did not understand grace until I read the comparison free life. And I know I keep going back to that book, but I can't help it. It was my favorite. I love I love all your stuff, but there was just so much healing and so much understanding I got from that. And I think that

Heather Creekmore [00:20:11]:

just

Tara [00:20:12]:

the even in this space now we have to give ourselves in each other so much grace because the truth is like our brains have been wired for so long to compare. And so I'd be lying if I said I still didn't go towards comparison And I don't have to feel condemned or shameful for that, but I get to choose and I get to receive the grace of God and say instead, when I go out into a room, instead of looking at people and comparing myself, I get to now say, can I just see them as just a person who's broken, who's living in a broken world, who struggles and suffers just like I do? Like, I have no idea what's going on behind the scenes and being able to to connect with them. I can connect with people in a such a more compassionate way now because I know what it's like to receive that grace and to feel it. And it's such a gift.

Heather Creekmore [00:21:08]:

Yeah.

Tara [00:21:08]:

And just understanding that and allowing and giving ourselves the grace as well through this process.

Heather Creekmore [00:21:15]:

Yeah. Press. Yeah. I just I feel

Presli [00:21:17]:

like there's gonna be a whole group of people listening to this podcast that are saying to themselves, well, I don't compare myself to other people. I compare myself to my old self, and I just wanna be better than my old self. So I'm wondering how, like, it it applies to them because I know there's people thinking that.

Heather Creekmore [00:21:36]:

Yeah. Well, I can

Heather Creekmore [00:21:36]:

I I was doing that for sure? I was doing that, and I feel like the Lord now, you know how, like, the photo memories will pop up? Just, oh, today on this day, I'm like, I I had to stop looking at those because I was like, this is not bringing up good feelings for me. I am envious of my own self. What's up with that? So I just turned those off. I'm like, I don't need to know that. You know, if I need to go back and find something, I will. But phone, you don't get to tell me that. I get you know, I have to compare every single day. But I definitely still do that.

Heather Creekmore [00:22:03]:

Like, it's still I still tend towards that. And so I feel like the lord is like, come on. Come on. We're gonna walk out and do something different.

Heather Creekmore [00:22:11]:

Yeah. Well, I think we objectify our old selves. Right? Like, we we just I mean, yesterday was my 19th wedding anniversary.

Heather Creekmore [00:22:20]:

And Happy anniversary.

Heather Creekmore [00:22:22]:

Thank you. I hated my wedding pictures when they came back. Like, my husband still remembers the fit I threw when, like, he I had gone on a work trip, and he had the wedding pictures in the car when he picked me up at the airport. We had, like, a 45 minute drive from the airport home. And he's like, here's the wedding pictures. He was so excited about it because he had seen them first. And I am looking through them in the car, like, oh, oh, it's awful. Oh, I mean, I threw a bit, and he did not understand.

Heather Creekmore [00:22:51]:

He was like, what is this about? Like, this is a really, like, negative attitude and all the things. And now I look at those wedding pictures and I'm like, oh, wow. Yeah. I

Jackie [00:23:02]:

think I've got

Heather Creekmore [00:23:03]:

pictures. Right?

Heather Creekmore [00:23:05]:

Really great wedding pictures. Yes. It's like, but then I think about who that woman was at the time. Right? Like, so I get objective of this patient and be like, wow, I look so good then. But man, I was miserable. And we had marriage problems because of that attitude I had towards myself and all my body image issues. Right? Like, our marriage was not as good as it is today. Like, we I mean, there are so many different layers of ways that I was just really messed up inside.

Heather Creekmore [00:23:36]:

I mean, I was definitely in an eating disorder that I had no idea I was in all the things, but I was just in bondage. And so if I just look at that picture and say, wow, that that woman was doing better. Like, that's just objectification. That woman was 31 years old. Right? She she had no clue about a lot of things that were really entangling and ensnaring her. And the woman I am today is different. Praise God. I mean, I think that's what we should be doing.

Heather Creekmore [00:24:06]:

Right? We should be growing and changing and being different. And if we're always looking back saying, I wish I was, I wish I was. We're not going in the right direction. Right? I I think I use this line in in the 40 day body image workbook, but, like, we get so I think culture tells us, don't let yourself go. Make sure you don't let yourself go. Right? And so I think that sentiment in and of itself, let yourself go, is like, okay. I have to stay the way I was. I have to wear the same size I wore in high school, and I can never change.

Heather Creekmore [00:24:32]:

I have to say, but, like, that is so unbiblical. You need to let yourself grow. Right? You need to grow and change and become more like Jesus and walk out sanctification. And sanctification sometimes means self denial where it's like, oh, I think working out 3 hours tonight would be best for me, but I'm gonna deny myself. And I'm gonna do something for my family or for others or for the Lord. Right? Jackie, jump in here.

Jackie [00:24:58]:

I just wanted to say to Presley's come actually, Rachel, you brought up Facebook putting up the memories. How do you feel when you see memories of your old statuses? Because when I read stuff that I wrote 10 years ago, I am embarrassed to that I ever wrote something like that. So Oh, yeah. Maybe, like, that may be a good tactic to be like, hey. Maybe I feel like I looked better, but I need to remember what I was thinking at those times. Right? And it's that sense of, like, false salvation, like the biggest loser before and after. Like, oh, if I could just get back to that, then I'll be everything will be fine. But do you really wanna go back to, like, your high school self, your college self? I mean, I find some old journals and read through your old journals, and that'll help.

Heather Creekmore [00:25:44]:

That's so good. That's so good. Yeah. That's so good. I mean, we need to change. We need to grow. And, yeah, your outside is gonna change and grow just like your inside, and that's normal. I mean, we don't condemn the 6 year old for, like, growing out of the size 6 x and eating the size, you know, 7, 8.

Heather Creekmore [00:26:04]:

Right? Like that. No. Of course. Like, you're like, yay, you're onto the next size. And yet we think, oh, well, once you reach 25, you should stay there forever. Like, it's just it's ridiculous. It's not reality. Okay.

Heather Creekmore [00:26:16]:

Closing thoughts here really quickly. Just like one super practical thing, Mimi, if you have it, super practical thing you have done to stop comparison in your life. Who wants to go first? And go ahead, Jackie.

Jackie [00:26:31]:

I I created a new Instagram account. I just especially with mom, I I have I in my old account was following so many mom influencers. And every day, I would open it up and see some mom, like, cutting shapes into her kid's lunches, and I'd be like, oh, I'm not doing that. I'm the worst. And I I I caught myself, and I was like, this is not healthy. And, you know, either do a clean of what's in your feed or I just went ahead and made a whole new account.

Heather Creekmore [00:27:00]:

And I

Jackie [00:27:01]:

was like, I'm not gonna follow any more mom influencers unless I really screen them first and know it's not gonna hurt me.

Heather Creekmore [00:27:07]:

Yeah. That's good. Super helpful. Who else?

Rachel [00:27:11]:

Mine goes back to that sentence that I say, and and literally just taking the taking a pause, which I learned from John Eldridge. I love his app, the pause app to just transition before I know I'm about to walk into somewhere where I have a tendency to compare where I'm gonna get triggered. I'll just take that literal deep breath, slow down and just say, Lord, I'm here to bless and not impress. And it has literally it's like I say it's like putting Jesus glasses on. So I'm holding up the shape of a heart right now over my eye and I'm like, these are Jesus glasses. And when I look through this, I see his perspective. And when I talk to you, you are a holy creation of God. You are not my competition.

Rachel [00:27:47]:

You know, I have nothing that I need from you. I just wanna show you Jesus' love. So I say, blessed and not impressed and put those Jesus glasses on. And I know that sounds cheesy, but I literally do that, and, I think that's helped me.

Heather Creekmore [00:27:59]:

Yeah. That's good. I love that. I love it. Presley. Oh, go ahead, Presley.

Presli [00:28:06]:

Yeah. So, yeah, basically, just what Rachel and Jackie said, cleaned up my my social media feed a lot. If I see myself getting triggered, I instantly unfollow. And in my relationships, just putting the focus on the other person and, yeah, trying to get to know them and see them as a person through how Jesus sees them and loves them. And and also in my bible, in my quiet time, really trying to understand the love of God and the gospel. And I've been a Christian since, like, 2018. And just recently, in the last couple of months, have I really understood the holy spirit helping me to understand grace. So meditating on grace and just studying grace and, yeah, the love of God is specifically for me.

Presli [00:28:48]:

And then and then I know what the love of God is so I can see it for other people and treat them as as such.

Heather Creekmore [00:28:54]:

Love it. Love it. Thanks, Press. Go ahead, Tara.

Tara [00:28:57]:

Okay. So I would say a huge thing for me has just been to stop seeing myself as just an image. So I just stop looking in the mirror, stopped looking at photos. Those are just images and saying I am more than a body and really learning that I am so deeply loved as a person and getting to understand that Mike would would, press was just saying about the grace of God, getting to understand who I am in Christ and stop making myself just a body. And then I preach to myself. I preach the gospel kinda like what Rachel was saying. I give myself if I'm going into a hard situation, I give myself a little a little gospel message. And I think Heather, you you kind of touched on it and I just wanted to end with this because it's been one of the most beautiful reminders of me.

Tara [00:29:42]:

Like you said, Jesus could have chosen anybody. He was the glory, the son of God. And he chose to come down and it's in Isaiah 53 and it's verse, 2. And he said he had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him. Nothing in his appearance that we should desire him. Yet our whole walk, like you're saying, our growth, our sanctification is to become more like him. So my job is to become more like him in the beauty of my appearance. It's become more like him in the beauty of my heart.

Heather Creekmore [00:30:11]:

Yeah. I love it. That's a good word. Good word. And I'll just quickly say, I think for me, I tell myself a lot, you were made on purpose for a purpose. Your purpose isn't being a model. Like, I'm not competing with Heidi Klum or anyone else. It's like, nope.

Heather Creekmore [00:30:28]:

What's my purpose? Nope. That's not it. That's not it. K, god. What do you have for me to do today? So Yeah. Hey. Thank you all so much. I think this has been a super helpful conversation.

Heather Creekmore [00:30:37]:

I've loved every minute of it. I know it's gonna bless some people. So thanks for doing this with me. And if it goes well, hey, let us know. Let's know what you thought about this. Like, drop it in the comments on YouTube or shoot us an email. Like, let us know what you thought about this because we can do it again. I I think these people like to hear great feedback.

Heather Creekmore [00:30:54]:

Again? Yeah. Yeah. Shoot us some topics. Yeah. We're we're open. So but thank you for, being here, team. And thank you for watching or listening today. I hope something today has helped you stop comparing and start living.

Heather Creekmore [00:31:09]:

Bye bye. Hey, if you're really ready to stop comparing and start living, go grab a copy of my brand new book, The Comparison Free Life, available right now on Amazon. The Compared to Podcast is proud to be part of the Life Audio podcast network. From our great Christian podcasts, go to life audio dot com.